Tuesday, March 10, 2009


One blogger made a comment on one of my posts entitled A DIME FOR A THOUGHT. ( see actual comment underneath). The posts was all about "letting go", not so much to my surprise that a certain comment and respond can be made, because I know situations differs, value formation matters and spiritual orientation counts.

Miss Dharlz heftly commented on the posts her thoughts about what she thinks on letting go of things. And after going over with her own blogsite, I found out roughly what she is going through and as a person I perfectly understand where she is coming from. And I respect whatever views she has on the posts in a way I respect her opinion about the concept of letting go.

But this, at some point bothers me because I can feel anger, hatred, anguish and anxiety on her way of stressing out what she have been through. I understand that she is a mom who at some point is fighting for something she feels she and her daughter deserves. The way it was told, she prefer the "bastard" to be in jail and learn his lesson the hard way. Im not quite sure what she meant by this, but if this means the father of her daughter or a trusted friend who betrayed deliberately that harmed her chick then I would understand the battle, just like any mother who would kill for their children. But if this concerns the latter, having the father of your child be summoned to jail isnt really a good idea especially if the whole situation do not justify whatever is the outcome.

I am pro women and I always make sure I am heard and that I can freely express what I thought. I also make sure justice prevails on any given situation. In such cases we need not think in depth as what we will going to do if a situation calls for an immediate action. Consecquently if a situation calls for an in depth thinking because there is a child or another life lesser than we are that is involve we tend to think that we are more oppressed having that given fact. Like the comment made, if Miss Dharlz pertains that "bastard" to be the father of her child and be that person in jail to learn his lesson the hard way behind bars and if her reasons do not justify the future her child then personally the battle is pointless. Why? because as a mother I know that its always the family that comes first, its everybody's dream to have a complete one as we grow older. Now pointing out on putting the father of your child in jail for a reason that you feel downsided because you may not have a career to push through and in the long run your daughter cant have a brighter future because the other party isnt ammenable for marriage then I dont think the whole thing makes sense. Winning this kind of battle is superficial. Its selfishness to yourself and to the child as well. How would you explain to your daughter what happen to her father when time comes she starts asking. How would like your daughter to have a biological father to be imprisoned and worst you are the cause of it all, and how is it possible for you to sleep well at night when you know your daughter will be visiting in prison just for her to know who her father is. And that I do not undertand, because if I were to consider the child's welfare in the long run having that said will not do any good especially to the child.

I am not taking side on either of the party involved on this respond. What I am just trying to point out is we can fight fair and square without having to have such an outcome in the future for the child. Think of a better resolution that will ensure the future of the child. A resolution that do not resound guilt and complications in the future. A resolution that is fair enough for your spirit, for the child and for the rest that are involved.I completely understand the anger, hatred and frustrations that these kind of situations brought to you. But then again the bottom line of this isnt just for ourselves, not just for our own personal interests but more importantly a promising future that can be tainted because of unrelinquish inacceptance of the reality.

And this my friend is what I thought, to you it may sound idealistic. It may sound melo dramatic but think it over and ponder. You are a full grown successful woman, dont be too clouded with what you think is right, if you are thinking a your child's future... then think again and consider better option.


dharlz said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
stirred but not shaken said...

I agree. And I know what wrong he did and he should be responsible for it to begin with, but he wasnt. I also feel for you as a woman and as a mother and I do not discount the inconvenience and humiliation the whole situation has. But more than anything else I pity Zarelle, because this battle isnt about her, all she might be looking forward in the future is a mother and father who may not be living in one house but neither is inaccessable should she wants comfort. But if the whole thing will make you happy and if that is what you think is right,and what is due to Lazar, then so be it. One way or another Im hoping that this whole thing will come to an end and whatever outcome this will serve will not affect Zarelle's future that much.

Thank you as well for sharing and you are always welcome.

Have a blessed day ahead!